sighhh

I register for my junior year on Tuesday.

When did we grow up? My roommate brought up an interesting fact the other day. She said, "You know, it's funny how we aren't kids anymore...we're 20. We're on the way to middle ages and husbands and jobs. We actually have to grow up within the next ten years." Isn't that crazy? I'm halfway to 40. I'm halfway through college. In two years...I'm on my own (cue Les Mis underscore...plays until you finish reading this post.)

I wish life was like Glee and you could fix everything by singing about it. Or at least resolve some issues, make a strong decision, you know. As if I could just stop what I'm doing right this second and the whole universe could begin a perfectly choreographed pop song/ musical theatre number that has similar themes as my life right now. I love my life, but sometimes I just don't have the energy to deal with the crappy parts.

I miss church. I miss having time to waste. I miss driving my car.
Three weeks left of school. Two papers, three exams, 21 days.

Good news: I got cast in a mainstage show...FINALLY. I'm super excited, it's a straight play, which is weird for me, but I'm going to continue my musical training as well. Now if I can just get through these next three weeks....it might kill me. Not even kidding I will be such a zombie by the end of this dang semester. Oh well....life is GREAT.

SOON. SUMMER. LOVE. DANCE. PLAY. LAUGH. GROW. GIVE.

I'm pumped :)

more lists

inside jokes can always be outside
mean girls quotes are still a crowd pleaser
since when is it okay to booty call someone over facebook?
you can be boy-crazy you're whole life.
i'm really into lists lately.
not so much into school...
sparklefish.
attitude changes everything.
you're always attached in some way, even if you don't want to be.
you can grow up and never mature.
stressing over something won't make the situation any better.
some people just change. some people won't even try to.
adventures.
not enough risk takers in this world.
life is beautiful.
have fun while you still can.
some pop artists really should not be famous (coughKeshacough)
people don't listen to each other anymore.
slow down.

"Oh what a tangled web we weave." -Sir Walter Scott

This weekend:

Don't Worry, Be Happy.
If they want ketchup and you got mustard, well you betta work that mustard because someone will need it soon.
What is the point of talking crap like that?
Oh my ga-UHH robot cholaaaaa.
Oh we definitely need to role play this one out.
Bee killing.
That's just mild bulemia. Only mild.
Can't even fit my arms around it.
You betta glow.
Tweeze my hair.
If I loved you.
Xoxo and we went shopping.

I love...

Aly, Chrissy, Katie, Betsy, Diego, Travis....all WW/BB.
my life.
my family.
my future den.
my city.
my sun.
my zeal.
my soon-to-be career. (my mustard)
my Lord.

Best weekend ever. Not even over.
Cast party tonight...Callbacks tomorrow and next week. In the words of FSCOT: "Let's GAT AT!"

I'm trying ot get in the writing mood. Despite my fabulous weekend, I do have a ton of homework to catch up on. Have I started it? Nope. Is it all going to be done Sunday? Yep. No I really should finish this paper today...but aren't weekends supposed to be for breaks? and FUN? Why yes, yes they are. :) The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and LIFE is all around us. Great friends, food, wine, everything just seems...right. Time to make some mint jasmine tea and curl up with my computer for a few hours of genius writing.

Quotes for today:

Take one from precious (and so dear to my heart because of "Look Who's Talking) Kirstie Alley..."Life. Lick it."

"XOXO AND WE'RE GOIN' SHOPPIN' AYYYY." - Aly Talley, Chrissy Shackleford. so much love.

To all of those who are worried about auditions/callbacks, relationships, classes, jobs, etc: "Sometimes what you want isn't always what you get, but in the end what you get is so much better than what you wanted." -Anonymous

"In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away." - Shing Xiong

Callback.
Oh, you mean you didn't see enough of my in the 5 minute time slot of my audition where I nervously sang 20 bars and skidded through a little speech? Oh. Okay, cool. Callbacks are so much better than auditions. Auditions are just exhausting, you know? You prepare so many different pieces and warm up your body, voice, mind, etc and show up 30 minutes early and fill out form after form after form and then get in the room....and it's over in two seconds. But to get the callback...now THAT means you were special. A callback menas they payed special attention to you and you get a second chance at auditioning. That's the money shot right there. Now it's your job to convince them that they really really do love you.
List goes up at five.
Ohhhh the suspense.
K

really great song I found on my ipod the other day: "Risque" by Cute Is What We Aim For

I got birds in my ears
And a devil on my shoulder
And a phone to the other
And I can't get a hold of her
And what's a crush to do?
And what's a crush to do when he can't get through?
Medically speaking you're adorable
And from what I hear you're quite affordable
But I like them pricey so exaggerate and t-t-t-t-t-t-trick me
Pretty please, just trick me. Pretty please...
I got birds in my ears and a devil on my shoulder
And a phone to the other And I can't get a hold of her
And what's a crush to do?
And what's a crush to do when he can't get through?
I'm obsessed and stressed with this mess
I can't think of things to write down, to type down
And these fingertips are moving faster than these lips
So you can only imagine how jealous my mouth is
So you can only imagine how jealous my mouth is

Sounds pretty desperate to me. But it also sounds endearing, heartfelt, stricken, starved, passionate, deep, fun, flirty, conniving, scandalous, loving, true. All adjectives that us theatre kids adore. Have someone in mind?

Sitting outside of my chemistry class, wasting time listening to music when I should be doing homework...You know what I miss most? Summer. Driving around with my windows and sunroof down, singing at the top of my lungs to some great song with magnificent swells and beats like "Risque," letting the sun hit my face and the humidity rush into my car like steam out of a kettle. I miss the way my hair feels after I lay in the sun and let the chlorine from the swimming pool sink in, causing the most uncanny golden softness. I miss going out on the boat and jumping into the ice cold lake where the temperature of the water truly takes your breath away... praying a fish doesn't try to nibble off my toes. I miss dancing in the 3rd floor rehearsal room of the Arkansas Rep with zero air conditioning in the middle of July, sweating, smiling, and producing endorphins like you can't even imagine. I miss taking the kids I nanny to museums and movies and zoos. I miss going to movies at night just to feel the freezing cold air hit you in the dark. I miss sleeping with the fan on and the windows open, hearing the crickets and stillness of the heat at night. I miss watching my skin get darker and my hair get lighter in the sunlight. I miss the feeling of climbing to the very top of pinnicle and feeling the breeze hit you over all the treetops of Little Rock. I miss walking up and down the Rivermarket to find trinkets and visit friends at work. I miss riverfest, and the fair, and my home. I miss the smell of my car, and my kitchen, and my room. I miss calling 8000 friends and having an impromptu pool party. All of this is just within reach...only 5 short weeks...And I can guarantee that I WON'T MISS SCHOOL.

I think I have summer fever. Not that I hate UT or anything, I love it. I love my time here, it's wonderful, it's just right now it's so...stressful. And I'm ready for a hot, sticky, fun-filled summer where I can work on my craft and towards my passion rather than simply passing the next chemistry test. You know what I mean? I can spend real time with my old friends and family and really live every day exactly the way I want to live it. My job is amazing, my friends are incredible, and my parents are just...wow. And I only have to worry about one online class. Bliss. This semester is crazy. 20 hours?? What was I thinking? I guess sometimes you have to deal with things you don't want to. That's just how life is. But not anymore. Life is too short to waste your time. We should be enjoying and living and loving and laughing, not...complaining and stressing about things we can't change. Why can't everyone just be happy?

"Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it?—every, every minute?"- Thornton Wilder, Our Town

"So life moves slowly when you're waiting for it to boil, feel like I watch from 6 feet under the soil." Ingrid Michaelson, Starting Now

"Quit hanging on to the handrails . . . Let go. Surrender. Go for the ride of your life. Do it every day." Melody Beattie, "Finding Your Way Home"

"Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you deal with it is what makes the difference." Virginia Satir


"What if the hokey-pokey is really what it's all about?" Unknown

Great words to think about,
K

did you know?

Jasmine Mint tea is the best.
I would like to be Bridgitte Bardot.
My hair is naturally large and dark, dark brown.
I have twice the amount of clothes that will fit in both of my closets.
I always have my blackberry in pain sight.
Cottages are cozier than palaces.
I sing in public.
Lamb skin feels like soft cloth.
Betsy can make you laugh when you're at your saddest.
Everything gives you cancer.
Banana peels are not that slippery.
Electric cars really don't help with the pollution problem.
People will put you down whenever they get a chance.
Fake diamonds are just as pretty as real diamonds.
Summer is the happiest season.
We are so lucky to be here.
Our bodies are simply little hotels for our souls.
I want to be cremated when I die.
Sopranos have the best solos.
Smoking WILL kill you.
You can get sunburned through the clouds.
My nails are never done.
A kiss doesn't mean "I love you."
A hug does.
You can stress over stress.
Having one glass of wine a night is better than having 5 glasses on Saturday night.
The greatest thing to hold to in one another.
You can't take it with you.
Life is short.
Smiling is the prettiest thing you could do for your face.
Immaturity is the most unattractive thing about a man.
I feel the best when I'm dancing.
I love avocado.
Bugs are attracted to sweeter perfumes.
So are men.
Honey fixes a sore throat.
Being upset about something you can't change is a waste of time.
If you say something rude about someone, they usually find out.
Diet pills don't work.
Marilyn Monroe gives great advice.
Your parents, teachers, grandparents, mentors, and bosses really do know more than you.
The sun makes your brain produce seratonin.
I'm horrible at chemistry.
Compassion is not just a motherly quality, but a human quality.
There are five love languages....gifts, service, touch, words, and time.
I like touch and time.
Laughter is good for the soul and the abs.
No one can love you like Jesus.

Just things I'm thinking about.
K