Like a Lily Allen Song

She really says it all, doesn't she? I wish I could say things like that...I think I'm too nice. I don't think I have ever been as furious as I was the other night. It overwhelmed me. Still trying to move past that, I guess.

I wish people could believe in people.
I wish people could trust people.
I wish friends knew how to be friends.
I wish life was as easy as a Lily Allen song, as if we all could say, "whatever" and move on.

But life isn't like that. When we get hurt, it stings for awhile. Even though we know we'll eventually submit to that incredible power of forgiveness and humble ourselves in the end, it stings. We ask ourselves, Why would this ever happen to me? Maybe its Karma. Maybe it's a lesson....I am a big believer in that whole saying, "Everything happens for a reason..." and I know that everything God gives you is either a blessing or a test. But which is it? A blessing or a test? What's the reason? I guess it's up to us to decide.

But for now, we try not to think about it, try to diffuse the ticking agitation bomb that pokes at the back of our psyche, until something can be resolved. We try to do the mature thing...or the right thing...or something, anything to move past this horrible awkward stage. I've hurt people before, and to those that I have hurt, I'm sorry. People have hurt me before, and to those that have hurt me, it's okay (or it will be...).

Why do people hurt each other?

I wish people would think before they act.
I wish people would stop hurting other people.

We can't be perfect. That's for sure. People screw up...stuff happens. It's not Leave It To Beaver...and It's not the end of the world.

I'm dealing with some hurt that centers around a certain group of people that I honestly want nothing to do with. We used to be a family. Now we're like this weird cess pool of drama and irritation. It seriously kills me to see our family fall apart.

But, unfortunately, sometimes relationships change for the worse. It just happens. It sucks, but it happens.

Still loving.

K