denied

Wow. Wowwwwww. What a life.
Denial is a funny thing. We deny realities almost everyday, or at least I do. Like now, for example- I'm denying the fact that my room isn't spotless, that I need to get up and go do a two hour workout, that it's finals week, and that life isn't filled with complications. Jus sayin.
BUT! I move home in six days. SIX. DAYS. That's insane. I'll be home for three months, loving life and doing what I'm best at--being in a theatre, dancing, loving, encouraging, helping, thriving, and LIVING. Waking up at 7 a.m. every day and going to a stupid spanish class is NOT living. Waking up at 7 a.m, making breakfast with my mom, driving in the sun and jamming out with my baby sis, running around the Rep all day, dashing to a jazz class, and going out with my best girls for a night of mayhem....THAT is living. And that's my summer. That would actually be a typical day. Plus riverfest, lake weekends, laying out, starbucks runs, shopping at the farmers market, running in the sprinklers late at night, getting home wayy too late, seeing old friends, sleepovers with Bridge, family dinners, driving with the windows down, ARKANSAS SUMMERS. What a life :)
Today, however, is a different story. Studystudystudy. SIGH.

Six days, three finals, one big move day,
K

P.S. also.....

You've got the best of both worlds. You're the kind of girl who can take down a man, And lift him back up again. You are strong but you're needy, Humble but you're greedy And based on your body language, And shoddy cursive I've been reading. Your style is quite selective, though your mind is rather reckless. Well I guess it just suggests that this is just what happiness is. Hey, what a beautiful mess this is...It's like picking up trash in dresses. Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you write Kind of turn themselves into knives. And don't mind my nerve you could call it fiction, But I like being submerged in your contradictions dear....'Cause here we are, here we are. Although you were biased I love your advice. Your comebacks they're quick, And probably have to do with your insecurities. There's no shame in being crazy, Depending on how you take these words I'm paraphrasing, this relationship we're staging. And what a beautiful mess, yes it is. It's like picking up trash in dresses. Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you say Kind of turn themselves into blades. And the kind and courteous is a life I've heard, But it's nice to say that we played in the dirt. Cause here, here we are, Here we are. Here we are....We're still here. What a beautiful mess, this is. It's like taking a guess when the only answer is "Yes." Through timeless words and priceless pictures We'll fly like birds not of this earth. And tides they turn and hearts disfigure, But that's no concern when we're wounded together. And we tore our dresses and stained our shirts But its nice today. Oh the way it was so worth it.

great weekend. so great. gahh i love my friends. horrible end to the weekend, but that's a long story. this week is rough, I have way too much going on. oh, and I don't feel like capitalization today.
sooooooo I'm leaving Austin in 2 weeks. which I now realize is a good and bad thing...we'll see how this plays out. i'm being really ambiguous in this post. my showcase is thursday, super excited about that. i also have two tests, two papers, and three finals coming up, but whatever no big deal right?

stay classy san diego.
K

sighhh

I register for my junior year on Tuesday.

When did we grow up? My roommate brought up an interesting fact the other day. She said, "You know, it's funny how we aren't kids anymore...we're 20. We're on the way to middle ages and husbands and jobs. We actually have to grow up within the next ten years." Isn't that crazy? I'm halfway to 40. I'm halfway through college. In two years...I'm on my own (cue Les Mis underscore...plays until you finish reading this post.)

I wish life was like Glee and you could fix everything by singing about it. Or at least resolve some issues, make a strong decision, you know. As if I could just stop what I'm doing right this second and the whole universe could begin a perfectly choreographed pop song/ musical theatre number that has similar themes as my life right now. I love my life, but sometimes I just don't have the energy to deal with the crappy parts.

I miss church. I miss having time to waste. I miss driving my car.
Three weeks left of school. Two papers, three exams, 21 days.

Good news: I got cast in a mainstage show...FINALLY. I'm super excited, it's a straight play, which is weird for me, but I'm going to continue my musical training as well. Now if I can just get through these next three weeks....it might kill me. Not even kidding I will be such a zombie by the end of this dang semester. Oh well....life is GREAT.

SOON. SUMMER. LOVE. DANCE. PLAY. LAUGH. GROW. GIVE.

I'm pumped :)

more lists

inside jokes can always be outside
mean girls quotes are still a crowd pleaser
since when is it okay to booty call someone over facebook?
you can be boy-crazy you're whole life.
i'm really into lists lately.
not so much into school...
sparklefish.
attitude changes everything.
you're always attached in some way, even if you don't want to be.
you can grow up and never mature.
stressing over something won't make the situation any better.
some people just change. some people won't even try to.
adventures.
not enough risk takers in this world.
life is beautiful.
have fun while you still can.
some pop artists really should not be famous (coughKeshacough)
people don't listen to each other anymore.
slow down.

"Oh what a tangled web we weave." -Sir Walter Scott

This weekend:

Don't Worry, Be Happy.
If they want ketchup and you got mustard, well you betta work that mustard because someone will need it soon.
What is the point of talking crap like that?
Oh my ga-UHH robot cholaaaaa.
Oh we definitely need to role play this one out.
Bee killing.
That's just mild bulemia. Only mild.
Can't even fit my arms around it.
You betta glow.
Tweeze my hair.
If I loved you.
Xoxo and we went shopping.

I love...

Aly, Chrissy, Katie, Betsy, Diego, Travis....all WW/BB.
my life.
my family.
my future den.
my city.
my sun.
my zeal.
my soon-to-be career. (my mustard)
my Lord.

Best weekend ever. Not even over.
Cast party tonight...Callbacks tomorrow and next week. In the words of FSCOT: "Let's GAT AT!"

I'm trying ot get in the writing mood. Despite my fabulous weekend, I do have a ton of homework to catch up on. Have I started it? Nope. Is it all going to be done Sunday? Yep. No I really should finish this paper today...but aren't weekends supposed to be for breaks? and FUN? Why yes, yes they are. :) The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and LIFE is all around us. Great friends, food, wine, everything just seems...right. Time to make some mint jasmine tea and curl up with my computer for a few hours of genius writing.

Quotes for today:

Take one from precious (and so dear to my heart because of "Look Who's Talking) Kirstie Alley..."Life. Lick it."

"XOXO AND WE'RE GOIN' SHOPPIN' AYYYY." - Aly Talley, Chrissy Shackleford. so much love.

To all of those who are worried about auditions/callbacks, relationships, classes, jobs, etc: "Sometimes what you want isn't always what you get, but in the end what you get is so much better than what you wanted." -Anonymous

"In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away." - Shing Xiong

Callback.
Oh, you mean you didn't see enough of my in the 5 minute time slot of my audition where I nervously sang 20 bars and skidded through a little speech? Oh. Okay, cool. Callbacks are so much better than auditions. Auditions are just exhausting, you know? You prepare so many different pieces and warm up your body, voice, mind, etc and show up 30 minutes early and fill out form after form after form and then get in the room....and it's over in two seconds. But to get the callback...now THAT means you were special. A callback menas they payed special attention to you and you get a second chance at auditioning. That's the money shot right there. Now it's your job to convince them that they really really do love you.
List goes up at five.
Ohhhh the suspense.
K